The Little Pill Box

My last post I realized that I didn’t quite include the title of the post, so I have decided to go back and explain while giving an update on my healing.

There is no question that going through a bone marrow transplant requires pharmaceutical support??  Or does it?  I am not so sure that this journey is about the physical experience, but is about my heart.  I have done a lot of what is called journey work and journaling, I feel so light and have found new passions in my life.  Love and Forgiveness is the path that heals most efficiently, but your ego wants you to stay mad and continue to create the story as to why you should be mad about an old boss or someone who owes you money.   Who cares, manifest the money by yourself.

I was once at a conference where we learned a lot about science combined with spirituality.  This woman took out a dollar bill and she explained the science behind that 1$.  This is just atoms and energy and you can actually measure the energy from any object.  So she explained that if you are angry towards money, or feel that you don’t have enough, all that negative energy is going to act like a shield.  However, if you believe you deserve abundance and use funds in a loving way you may see a lot more float into your life.  I have seen this happen first hand to many people.

There is no difference with this example as there is with illness.  If you fear it will continue to cause suffering in your life.  If you believe you are healed and healthy, embracing all the lessons that come along with this Dis—–Ease then it will be an effortless journey.  I have changed many of my thoughts and I can’t believe how effortless things are opening up for me.  All of my blood work is completely beautiful and I am 100%accepted Shads white cells which is really exciting.  In addition, all the people who pray for me….please don’t stop bc I believe that is a large part of this as well.

Getting to the pill-box:  I can’t imagine what this does to a mother and Father.  My mother has held strong for me and really has helped me change my thoughts when I was basking in fear.  My Mother and Tad have tag teamed making sure that I am in a good place.  They let me cry when I am scared, but help pull it all full circle.  It is hilarious when I walk into the kitchen and she is organizing all the pills in the little red box like I am an 80-year-old woman.  Then the arguments about if I took the right ones…she says it is my memory “but it is ok because once I get off the pills it will be better ” flashes a big old smile.  I went up to my brother’s house to have a weekend out of the house and she even called to make sure I took my pills.  It has been comical in so many ways.  Then Tad is like the secret spy, just watching and when he feels I need to eat more a shake shows up on my night stand.  Don’t get me wrong I do love how much they are taking care of me because it just reminds me of how much they love me.  Love from all who surround you is an amazing healer…..I am blessed.

I still have some healing to do and don’t think that when I head to the doctor to get blood drawn that I don’t feel the power of fear.  But I just work my mantras that I have created and see myself as whole, as I always will be.


I am weaning off medication, exercising, and need to gain about 30 lbs any suggestions would be great.  Love and miss you all.  If you want to come and visit I would love to see you!!





  1. Holls, you are so loved in so many ways by people near and far, those who interact with you frequently and those of us (like me) who read your blog and are continuing to follow your journey, even though it’s probably been well over 25 years since I’ve seen you. Your strength through this whole experience shouldn’t surprise me as even as a child, you held your own and stood up for me on numerous occassions 🙂 You are such an inspiration and an amazing wife, mother, daughter, sister, teacher and friend!!


  2. Hey Holly!

    Sorry we haven’t been able to connect over the phone. I know your life is crazy right now, but when is life not crazy for any of us, really? Just wanted to share a thought that jumped into my head after reading your post.

    First, decide who is your authority. That person, idea, entity, etc. is the only one who really matters. Keep in mind, one doctor can sometimes have a different opinion than another one, so what one human person says is strictly their human opinion. No reason to be afraid of what they will tell you. I believe that even the highest expert in their field can only tell you what they understand on a physical level. Spirituality far exceeds any physical “fact.”

    Second, I spoke with a nurse once who told me about a patient that she worked with who had a very serious illness and had lost an alarming amount of weight as a result of it. The patient was in her care for a week or so before completely overcoming the affliction. Her initial healing had come about as a result of her diligent prayer. I don’t remember if she was using medication or not, but it really doesn’t matter. Once her illness had disappeared, her weight was still well under a healthy amount. When the fear of the illness was defeated, everything else fell into place. Just as in the lecture about the dollar bill, if your thought is in the right place, everything else falls into harmony as well. In less than one day, the patient had fully regained her weight back. It was a shocking testimony to hear because that just does not seem physically possible. So, remember Holly, that when you are praying in that deepest of spiritual realities, do not be confined by what is considered normal by human standards. Do not pray to gain weight. Instead, pray to know that you are complete, not lacking in any way (“weigh,” haha). When you heal yourself from the spiritual side first, the physical side responds. Time is a physical element. Also, the physical body does not think for itself. The spiritual reality that you create for yourself will be manifested in the body. It is the essence of mind over matter and you can do it!

    Love, Hillary


  3. Gaining weight has never been a problem for me, I suggest pizza, and lots of ice cream, but only the real good stuff……And, of course there is that occasional 6 pack of your favorite beer that helps you pack em on…Hey Holly, you are loved. xoxoxo Lynn


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s