Interval Training

“We are shaped by our thoughts; we become what we think. When the mind is pure, joy follows like a shadow that never leaves. – Buddha

As the walls are slowly starting to close in on me, just as all my counts are starting to hit bottom (which is exactly what they want to happen YAY!), I am realizing that this first phase of treatment is like Interval Training.  I imagine myself in spin class, peddling like the crazy lady I am, pretending to be the next contender for the Tour de France, minus the outfit.  Getting ready to step one leg over the bike, knowing that this is that most challenging course the world knows.  Going as hard and strong as I can, and then I hear the instruction- it is time to slow down for the great break where I check breath, scenery, and of course check in with my thoughts.  It is here in the peaks and valley that thoughts can completely shift your entire experience in so many directions.

This image is not that far from my current reality, as I sit on the stationary bike in room 52.  The walls decorated with so many amazing cards, words of encouragement, two vision boards, and pictures.  The pictures are like gold, as they represent so much laughter, love, and abundance.  Reminding me that my prayers are already answered and I just have to work backwards to finish.  The nurses are amazing and are true healers in their support during my adventure, adding much laughter and love.

So here we are, a choice of epic proportion.  I can choose my ego or God Source…simple as that.  The divided mind is set up into two pathways: one the ego, which sets up the landscape of suffering through fearful thoughts, negative outcomes, false attachments, and sometimes may even try to be the voice of reason.  The second is the God Mind, which is the most brilliant lit path that guides through a constant love and truth.  So this should be a simple choice?  It is a simple choice, but it is the interweaving of the paths that creates the learning lessons of life and free will.

At 3 am, 2 of the nurses and I tried to maneuver through these deep thoughts and it almost seemed to take on a scene Monty Python Style. After much laughter and even getting into a small conversation about all the reality TV we use to try to get a “break” from our thoughts, I decided that I made a small stride to understanding:  It is a choice to be of and embrace the God (Source) Mind.  However, it may be important to check in with the ego mind instead of ignoring its very existence.  Trying to push away the thoughts will allow the ego to become a stronger force, which will try to confuse you and upset the delicate balance you need during a challenge.  The ego mind is very unpredictable and creates boundary within boundary, merely taking every opportunity it sees to plant the seeds of doubt.

However, just when you think that you have the odds stacked against you, you sense the familiarity of Gods light ever so gently guiding you back. Each time you turn to look back to Gods path the light just seems sweeter.  In many instances it is just as if you never left.  The familiarity of the light is so comforting and warm that there is no question of confusion.  You just simply feel love and navigation by love is always the right direction to our “gut”.   To feel the strength in progress being made and knowing that it doesn’t have to be looked upon as a step backwards, it is just a victorious step.

The polarities of the ego mind vs. God Mind are so deep and intricate that we could and do spend a lifetime sorting them through. Taking notice of the scenery in the ego mind is the contrast to the space that God invites us to live each day, until eventually the ego mind has been passed by through the whisper of wisdom.

There are so many examples of how the divided mind shapes our lives.  When hearing stories of the Chilean minors, most of them spoke directly of the egoic thoughts that tried to weaken their source and their will to survive.  There are countless books that guide us on the journey to understand and move past blocking points of the ego.  A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle, in my opinion, is one of the best tools.  However, in day-to-day life it can seem a challenge keeping the weeds pulled from the Garden of the mind.  Tools I have come to use daily and may be familiar to many of you:

  1. Feel as if you already have what you want- Instead of focusing on the lack, feel every emotion connected to this manifestation as if it is already in your life.  “Feeling is the language that speaks, feel as though your goal is accomplished and your prayer is already answered.”
  2. Like attracts like- so make sure you align yourself with like energy then act upon your God Mind.
  3. Quit the “yeah, but” or waiting for the other shoe- The ego wants to plant the seed of doubt so be prepared and have an out clause. For me it is going back to step 1.
  4. Gratitude- focusing on conscious abundance. Dr. Wayne Dyer recommends the affirmation “I appreciate all that I am and all that I have.”
  5. Trust your gut and make peace with your current reality.

Once this becomes second nature to you, you will feel a renewed sense of peace in working with our thoughts.  “Change your thoughts, Change your life” WD



Thank for all your continued support.  Please add and share stories that you feel will add to this community of learning.

Peace and Blessings,



  1. Holly, I read your posts and all I can think about is what an amazing woman you are and how even in this recent challenge you have embraced all that is good and positive. My thoughts and prayers are always with you. Keep strong and remember what a beautiful light is at the end of this recent journey! God bless you!


  2. Hi Holly, it’s so good to hear from you again. I want you to know that you are in my thoughts every day, and I’m surprised you are still there, because I know in my heart you are healed. I started reading the disappearance of the universe, and it is wonderful, as I knew it would be. I can’t wait to skype with you and your friends so we can delve deeper into it together. It’s an amazing book, and opens my heart and ego to so many new ways to think. Again Holly, thank you so much for being you, and sharing the love that lives in your heart. Can’t wait to see you, love and blessings…………Lynn


  3. Hey Holly!

    Two thoughts for you that reflect this post:
    1. A house divided against itself cannot stand. You cannot reflect two mind sources. If God is All, and God is Mind, then God/Mind is All and mortal mind/negative suggestion is powerless and the illusion. I love how logical this is. You can reason your way through challenges. If the math doesn’t add up, you’re using the wrong kind of math.

    2. I love what you wrote about facing the ego/mortal mind. I like to think of it as being aware of the suggestion, acknowledging it and then intentionally turning away from it. A bully will keep pestering to get your attention but will leave you alone after you choose to not react.

    Hope you got the album I e-mailed and the article.



  4. Ohhh, I love all this! So positive!

    When I was diagnosed with a malignant melanoma in 2008, I had to go through a little journey with many stages. I was so blessed…Like you, mine was caught early. And was treatable.

    Summer came around and I found myself FEARING the sun morbidly. I was ANGRY…The beach had always been my favorite place in the world, and laying in the sun listening to the waves — such a highlight of my life. It had been years since I had “suntanned” but getting color naturally was something my skin did. All of that made me think I would never get skin cancer; the fact my skin seemed to take so well to the sun, and that I loved it so much.

    Neither was true. My loving of that activity did not prevent my cells from mutating. Wow, what a dilemma, huh? Talk about a blow to the ego. I realized early on I could continue being fearful and obsessing over future melanomas, or I could change how I thought about my situation. By the next summer, I was much better able to manage my ego and surrender to God.

    Once in a while I would let myself get 15 minutes of sun and a tiny bit golden. And I invested in some beautiful caftans as applying and reapplying sunscreen is just not something I enjoy. And I DECIDED to trust I was doing my best and stop trying to control the outcome. Just let it be and get back to living. I had to discover what else it was about being on the beach or in the sun that brought me such peace, and I delved more deeply into those. Like just taking the time to slow down, gaze out at the ocean or Lake, watch the birds and other creatures, listen to the beautiful sounds, comb the shore for treasures, etc.

    At first my ego saw it as an assault. Oh poor you, Maureen, you will never be able to enjoy the sun or beach again. Boo-hoo. But eventually Love won over. See Maureen! You can spend time at the beach, as much as you want actually, just DO WHAT YOU NEED TO DO and ALL WILL BE WELL!

    Everything in life is a learning experience and an opportunity to take ourselves spiritually to the next level (even though in the moment we don’t always feel that way nor should we necessarily!). You are aware of this, Holly, that is obvious and you are working your program in every possible way — physically, spiritually, mentally. The difference between you and a lot of people is your ability to integrate these lessons in THE NOW and not retrospectively or futuristically. This is really something amazing and unique to Holly.




Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s